Thursday, May 7, 2009
Getting a Raise Through Healthy Coffee
I love coffee. Unadulterated—hot and black. That’s why I’m enjoying the current flurry of news about the health benefits of coffee. In fact, I’m gulping a cup right now before taking a 15- to 30-minute catnap. Why? Because researchers at The Sleep Research Centre, Loughborough University in Leicestershire, England have found that since caffeine takes a half hour to kick in, I’ll jump up after a short snooze all alert and rested. After my refreshing nap, I plan to Starbuck my boss into a raise. According to the European Journal of Social Psychology, caffeine may make people more open to persuasion. Researchers say it hones cognitive function, causing skeptics to be more receptive to a convincing case. One concern: the boss-man drinks decaf. So, if I "accidentally" give him a large cup of bold-brew regular will I give him stomach pain, agitation, anxiety, restlessness, confusion, seizures, dehydration, faster breathing rate, fast heartbeat, fever, frequent urination, increased sensitivity to touch or pain, irritability, muscle trembling or twitching, vomiting (sometimes with blood), fibrocystic breast disease, ringing or other sounds in ears, seeing flashes of “zig-zag” lights, and trouble in sleeping. If I get my raise, should I care?
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Ah, yes . . . the age old question ~ once answered "liquor is quicker", but now, with a whole plethora of new and immoral ways to gain agreement from those disinclined, it seems that coffee might just have slipped under the radar, were it not for your vigilence in bringing this to light. We are in your debt.
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